The First Day of the Rest of My Life

Saturday, October 22, 2005

It looks like after 4 months on the job, I'm not enjoying the job. Allow me to elaborate.

Without revealing too much, I work in the investment field, talking to a lot of clients throughout the day. And the thought of going to work in the morning does not make me happy. I realize that going to work doesn't make a lot of people happy, but it really doesn't make me happy.

Here's the thing: one month into actually performing my actual job duties, my performance is okay. Yesterday, we were pulled into meetings and given the scale by which all employees are measured. My performance, compared with those other newcomers like me, was okay. I could be a bit more efficient, but I'm good so far.

But the actual job really stresses me out. Clients seem to keep coming, one after another. Different needs, different approaches. Some are easier than others, but the hard ones just seem to be ones that I can't handle. The worst part is that I seem to bring work home with me: stewing over bad experiences, wondering when the next bad one will be. I even stress so much during the day, my armpits turn into fountains, soaking any and all shirts I wear. (I've dealt with this problem for a while, but the day just seems to exacerbate things.)

Don't get me wrong, I'm not ready to quit. For one, this is the nicest regular paycheck I've ever received. After going without a check for almost a year, I'm not ready to go back to unemployment. Secondly, I don't know what the hell I'd do. (Then again, I've had the "what am I gonna do with my life" thought since I was in college.) Thirdly, I have an agreement to stay with the job for at least two years, or I'm out a few thousand dollars.

Guess I just needed to rant. Any career happiness tips or other advice would be greatly appreciated.


  • It is not what you do, it's how you do it. If it's not this job, then it'll be something else.

    By Blogger Sandra, at 1:17 AM  

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