The First Day of the Rest of My Life

Sunday, January 27, 2008

I e-mailed her today.

I thought about her during a men's retreat I attended with my church this weekend. (An ACTS retreat, if you're familiar with the term.) I thought about the crap I put her through when we were dating, and I decided that I needed to apologize. I also needed to forgive myself for all of that, which I think I accomplished.

When I got back home this afternoon, I typed up a quick message totalling about twelve lines. I didn't really know what to expect, or what might come from it. May have been it a bit selfish on my part, but I just wanted to get it off my chest.

A few minutes later, I checked my inbox, and saw one new message. The subject? "Delivery Status Notification (Failure)." Honestly, I think I'm okay with it. I doubt tracking her down will do much good. Maybe if I run into her again, I'll tell her about it. But maybe just me putting it down on cyber-paper is good enough.

About the weekend itself, it was awesome. I ended up being one of only two guys there who didn't have a wife and kids (the other guy being a seminarian). But I think I know what to do, and what not to do, if I ever get there. I can say this: I will try my best to be a better son, a better friend, a better Catholic, and a better man.



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